haiz.. today talk to my er jie in msn.. i duno y, actually i gt quite upset.. cos i told her tt i wanna go find KH alone.. but she say very dangerous, n dun let me go..
eventually many people quite object about me goin to see him.. i think cos he is a msian ba.. and mayb in my family's view, they might onli see that im the one contributing.. actually he did contribute in this relationship.. but mayb i might SHOW it much much much more than he does.. but tt doesnt mean tt he does not luv me as much as i does ma..
but i juz wanna see him once more.. at least stay together a few days before sch reopens.. juz hope we can get a normal lovers life arh... Seeing couples go watch movie together, i also i can watch a movie wif him... Chatting freely wif my bf, also my dream.. (if nt my phone bill wun bomb like hell le.. haha) but no one seems to noe or notice.. in other eyes, i might juz b talkative.. but without communication, alot of things wun b workin out..
i wan my family, friends and him.. i wan it to b balance.. i believe i can work this out.. but in my family eyes, they thought tt KH and friends are more important than them.. in KH's eyes, he thinks that friends and family comes b4 he does... Actually to me, these 3 factors really rocks my world.. so to me, the 3 of them really very important to me..
but i start to get tired of these.. feel like closin myself up.. dun wanna get connection wif the outside world, wait till he can come to singapore.. Hearing negative advices from my family tired me out of tis freakin world of mine.. although I need support from my family.. But they keep givin me negative advices...
and today i saw wad my sis types in msn, it hurts me.. although my friend once said tt, "U like then ok le ma.. y care so much about hw people thinks??" at tt time, i juz laugh laugh.. but deep down in my heart, its juz a sentence tt wun b appearin.. cos to me, Family, Friends, Love means lots to me.. u might ask, which one is most important to me.. but i can tell u that i duno.. cos all seems to b like have the same position in my heart.. how can i position which is most important in my heart when all of it hav the very same place in my heart??
i wanna see him once more.... juz stick wif him a few days.... i wanna go find him... juz wanna find him..........................
